When Paul wrote, AHusbands,
love your wives, and do not be embittered against them@
(Colossians 3:19 NAS), he contrasted the two fundamental
and opposing attitudes of heart that a man can walk in
toward his wife. He can love her, or he can be
embittered toward her. It=
s a case of one or the other. Paul doesn=t
allow for a mixture of some of each, or for
rationalizing, AI
love her, but she...@
What does it mean to be embittered? The Greek
word, pikraino (Strong=
s #4087), means to be exasperated, irritated, angry,
or indignant. Related words imply
extreme wickedness and bitter hatred (pikria--#4088)
and harsh and virulent (pikros--#4089).
This bitterness is located in the heart (James 3:14--ABut
if you have bitter (#4089) jealousy and selfish
ambition in your heart...@).
It comes out the mouth (Romans 3:14--AWhose mouth
is full of cursing and bitterness [#4088]@
and James 3:11--ADoes a
fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and
bitter [#4089] water?@).
It is associated with wrath, anger, clamor, slander,
and malice (Ephesians 4:31). It also is found as a part
of Ajealousy@
(James 3:14 or zelos--#2205) which denotes zeal,
excitement of mind, or fervor of spirit, which in the
negative can release fierce indignation and punitive
zeal. Bitterness occurs when someone comes short
of the grace of God, and it causes trouble and defiles
not only the person who is its object but also many
others (Hebrews 12:15 [NAS]--"See to it that no one
comes short of the grace of God; that no root of
bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many
be defiled").
In sum, bitterness is a death-ministering hardness of
heart toward one=
s wife that must be removed from its place and put away
(Ephesians 4:31). It must be replaced with love.
This love is to be put on and walked in, as the
essential characteristic of the grace-given new self
which has already been made for us in the likeness of
God in righteousness and holiness of the truth
(Ephesians 4:22-5:2). And so Paul says:
As those who have been chosen of God, holy and
beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness,
humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one
another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a
complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave
you, so also should you. And beyond all these things
put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity
(Colossians 3:12-14 NAS.
(Back to Top)
